It’s exam time again, so as has been my habit I have come up with another useless, thoughtless post.
Are friends really what we think friends are? With the possible exception of a parent-offspring relationship, isn’t it always the case in any relationship when we ask (usually subconsciously), “What’s in it for me?” If we analyze carefully, our closest friends are generally those with whom we have some business (not necessarily monetary) and from whom we can gain something. While I was scathingly sceptical when DD said this a couple of weeks ago, I am beginning to see his point. His opinion was, “You call a person your friend when you have some purpose or business with him/her. There are no friends, just collaborators.” I do not at all agree with what he said but the question still arose in my mind, “How many of all those whom I consider as friends are actually going to stand by me when the need comes? What purpose am I serving them? Only time will tell.” Meanwhile, I shall remain the same, dumb, unexploitative person.
In a way, friendship is a crude form of a savings account. You help out a person so that one day he/she would also help you out when you need it. In fact, in most cases, he/she is obliged to do so unless it is one of those sly foxes who forget you once the job is done.
It is not like it is a bad thing. To have some amount of selfishness, is in my opinion, not wrong at all. When opportunity comes knocking, there are no friends or foes, just competitors. So think about it. Are you a friend or a collaborator?
I would like to end with the thought that the term ‘true friend’ is misplaced. What is a true friend supposed to mean? All those qualities which we expect from a ‘true friend’ should be there in a friend itself, otherwise he/she is not a friend at all.